***AN APPLE BOOKS BEST BOOK FEBRUARY *** A NYLON ”FIFTY BOOKS YOU’LL WANT TO READ THIS YEAR” *** AN ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY MOST ANTICIPATED BOOK OF 2019 *** A RUMPUS MOST ANTICIPATED 2019 PICK *** A PUBLISHER’S WEEKLY STARRED REVIEW *** “DAZZLING”
praise for HOW TO BE LOVED, out now
“A lovely memoir.” — People Magazine
“This remarkable read is both an illness-and-recovery memoir and a love story that’s unlike anything we’ve ever read. Hagberg Fisher’s book is about the radical surrender required by love and the resilience it offers in return.” —Apple Books
”It feels like sunshine, to find a writer who has already hacked a clear path through the jungle of their ideas for you, even when the subject matter is dark.” —Summer Brennan, author of High Heel
“How to be Loved is searing, compassionate, and unexpectedly funny in its exploration of how suffering can beat us down to the point that we are forced to accept grace, whether we like it or not.” —The Rumpus
“Grab a box of tissues for this one and have your best friend on speed dial. You’ll definitely want to call them after you turn the last page.” — Bookpage
“Dazzling.” — Publisher’s Weekly Starred Review
“An empowering tale of triumph and courage in the face of uncertainty.” — Yoga Journal
“This moving, beautifully written book reveals the lengths we go to put conditions on our love, the ways in which we resist the people who want to come close to us, and the truth that it is in our weakest moments that we are most likely to find the greatest sources of strength.” —Kristin Iversen, Nylon
“It is the revelation that love can be unconditional and profound that makes this memoir stand out from many similar ones. A well-written, emotionally uplifting tale of friendships, extreme illnesses, and understanding what love truly means.” —Kirkus Reviews
“An inherently engaging, impressively compelling read from beginning to end, How to Be Loved is extraordinarily well written and ultimately inspiring.” —The Midwest Book Review
"A searing, funny, painstakingly crafted memoir that never goes for the obvious." — Kristi Coulter, author of Nothing Good Can Come From This
“A coming-of-age memoir that moved me to tears.” —Doree Shafrir, author of Startup
“I would read it every day, if I could." —Melissa Febos, author of Whip Smart and Abandon Me
“Eva Hagberg Fisher is a gift to this world.” —Jennifer Pastiloff, author of the forthcoming On Being Human.
MORE ADVANCE PRAISE
"Eva Hagberg Fisher's captivating HOW TO BE LOVED is more than a coming-of-age memoir that moved me to tears — it's also a fascinating medical mystery wrapped in a love story, but not the kind you're necessarily picturing. Hagberg Fisher shows us that the most deeply felt love isn't always romantic, that our chosen families can love us just as much (if not more) than our biological ones, and that sometimes, the hardest part of loving someone else is allowing them to love us back." —Doree Shafrir, author of Startup
"Eva Hagberg Fisher's story is the most beautiful sort of instruction manual. Through each harrowing, awkward, compelling, and heart-aching turn of the author's journey we glimpse the way a transformation is forged. Illness, addiction, and uncertainty are torments, but for some of us, asking for help can be the hardest challenge of all. This memoir is for us. It reminded me that every kind of healing is helped by the brave act of letting ourselves be loved. I would read it every day, if I could." —Melissa Febos, author of Whip Smart and Abandon Me
“Most of us are taught to keep our innermost thoughts to ourselves, to bide our time with the hope that they may sort themselves into something more conventional, more palatable. Eva Hagberg Fisher’s unforgettable memoir skillfully upends this concept: it shows us the great bravery and priceless value of reckoning openly with the emotions that feel too vulnerable to express, the relationships too happy-making to believe, the friendships too bolstering and vital to endanger with – the horror! – our well-earned gratitude. How to Be Loved is so much more than a stirring travelogue through the world of illness; it is a powerful look at how personal bonds make our lives healthier even when we may be too preoccupied – or too fearful – to appreciate them.” – Rakesh Satyal, author of Blue Boy and No One Can Pronounce My Name
"The best memoirs offer us something much bigger than one person’s story—giving individual voice to the collective human experience—and this is one of those rare books. HOW TO BE LOVED bravely illuminates the widely shared experiences of addiction, illness, sex, love and friendship, with a level of depth and intimacy that brought me to the brink of existential fear while making me laugh out loud. At its core, this book is about how little we understand what’s happening under the surface—the childhood anguish that can exist inside the households of “successful” parents, the emotional and physical pain that we privately experience beneath carefully crafted social media personas, the very real and near-death symptoms of disease that doctors dismiss when they can’t find an obvious diagnosis. Eva bears witness to many modes of destruction—divorce, abuse, alcohol/drug addiction, and the near-destruction of her own body and mind from a rare disease that sends her ping-ponging to different physicians and across the country in search of somewhere that feels like health and home. How she inevitably finds this sense of place and purpose—and the friends, lovers and health care professionals who trek with her—ultimately taught me something invaluable about what it means to be at the center of a storm, and what it means to be a caretaker or empathetic friend willing to help. I highly recommend this book to anyone who’s ever been reassured that "everything will be fine" when they really want others to honor the terror that maybe it won't; and to anyone who’s ever been brave enough to push through that terror—as a patient, caretaker, friend or lover—to what lies on the other side.”” —Adam Nemett, author of We Can Save Us All
“Eva Hagberg Fisher is a very bright, marvelously articulate, and enormously talented writer. I know her work well, and I have worked with her. This is an author to savor both reading and meeting.” —Thomas Farber, author of The Beholder and Here and Gone
“Eva Hagberg Fisher is a gift to this world. Her astute understanding of the way we work as humans- and the way she can turn that understanding into compassion, love, and stories- is something to behold. I wish her to be my secret, but I know, as with all gifts, that they are best shared. To not have the world know her way with words, her use of language, and her beautiful and radical empathy would be a travesty. Her writing is necessary and heart-mending.” —Jennifer Pastiloff, author of the forthcoming On Being Human.
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